a letter to my neighbor with the two Yes on 8 signs

Dear Voter,

CONGRATULATIONS! You won!

Your vote for Yes on 8 has helped write discrimination into the constitution. Lucky for all of us, your views based on religion and fear have helped SAVE OUR FAMILIES from loving and committed relationships that were so threatening to us. Don’t we all feel more safe and secure now, knowing that we have eliminated a civil right from a minority group?

Hopefully we will soon be able to vote on other civil rights issues that are important to our communities. For instance, let’s hope a proposition banning divorce will make it onto the next ballot. We should be able to tell all adult couples what they can and cannot do, and banning divorce will take care of the problem of children not growing up with a mother and a father. After all, marriage is sacred! Banning divorce should really have no effect on the straight community.

Actually, we’d like to take it a step further, and ban all marriages in which there are no biological offspring produced. Like Tony Perkins, from the Family Research Council, says, “the purpose of marriage is to have children.” If you have any family members that are not planning on having children within a committed relationship, we hope that you will take it upon yourself to tell them how wrong this really is. It is all of our duties to keep a watchful eye on others’ personal relationships.

So, again, thank you for passing judgment on others, and making a decision to vote against equality. Once gay people think they have equal rights, then ALL minority groups will start assuming that same thing. And, we all know how that story ends!

Sincerely,
Another voter