the best dog in the world is now in heaven

that is all i wanted to say.

carpool diaries: torture device with wheels

Jeeps: fun in the sun, wheee when you're alone, or maybe with one other person, driving down the coast into the sunset.

BUT WHEN IT COMES TO CARPOOLS, THEY ARE EVIL.

I sit in the backseat of a Jeep for my carpool. The seats are straight up and down and it's impossible to lean back, much less rest your head on the "head rest."

The seatbelt cuts right across my neck, no matter how I sit. It tightens when we hit bumps, and doesn't loosen up. Every morning we hit one big bump which makes the 2 of us in the backseat go flying up, tightening the belt even more.

By the time I get to work, I can barely breath.

If you are considering being the driver in a carpool, I beg you... choose any other car but the Jeep. Do it for your riders. Please.

carpool diary: crack of dawn

My carpool driver just sent out an email asking if we can leave a half hour early tomorrow morning so he can make a concert after work. THAT MEANS BEING PICKED UP AT 6:40 am.

No thank you.

So that he can make his concert, i lose money because i have to pay anyway, whether i ride with them or not? not cool.

hurrrrmp.

what is going on here, world?

wow, i don't mean to be a bummer, but this is just today:

huh?

Uhh

Eckkk

what?

WHATTTTT?

crawling back into a rainbow colored bubble filled with unicorns, goodbyeeeee.

carpool diaries: in the middle

I drive in a carpool with 3 other people who work for my company. Carpools are weird. You're in close quarters with strangers. Usually car rides are more intimate...friends, family, your favorite music.

I won't disclose any information about my carpool partners, nor will I bad mouth them, because I am sure that they are all nice people. but, i do want to share some of the ..interesting...things I experience. Hence, the carpool diaries has been born.

**
My backseat carpool mate is quite small. however, she takes up an extraordinary amount of space for such a small person. For example, she brings empty boxes home almost every night. she puts them in the seat between us, and my arm is squished by cardboard. on top of this, when there aren't boxes in between us, she likes to sit really close to the middle because for some reason she likes to watch the road from between the seats, instead of looking out her own window.

Neko. Dreams. Sad Songs.

My mid-life crisis is in full swing. Is it too much to ask that my dog be cured of his cancer and that I find a job where I'm challenged, paid, and given the chance to further my career? I'm 40 years old, for god's sake.

sigh. sigh again.

in the meantime, I am searching for things that make me happy. There are some, believe it or not. Here's a few:



PUPPEH!

BIG PUPPEH!

This doesn't make me "happy" but makes me happy I now I have a carpool, even if it does pick me up at 7 am.



TWEEDY got adopted! :-)



okay, i'm all happied out.

bye.

CUTEST THING IN THE WORLD.

religeous

hi blog.

so, the wacko-ness don't stop.

check it.

Here's a wacko who kidnapped a girl(s?), and loves, loves, loves him some God. Yep. Seriously, here is one good reason I don't want kids. Kidnapping by a crazed religious nut. I can't think of anything worse.

Here's a pastor who thinks gays should be murdered. "Every gay he's known has been a molester." HMMMM. Most straight pastors have limited experiences with openly gay folks. I wonder where he has been hanging out while his young wife raises his brood of starkly white wonderbread children.

Here's a "politician" who thinks that it's a-okay to discriminate against those pesty homersexuals. (said with a snarl and a drawl).


but you know what? Linda Ronstadt is here to save the day. And, that is gonna keep me going today.

bye!

KaRaZy

people are nuts, but you already knew that, didn't you?

for example:

Another one of these stories.

Ridiculous men.

Disgusting man.

INSANE WOMAN HAS BABY, EATS BABY. "Not in her right mind" might be an understatement. (When are people going to have to take a mental health exam before breeding? I'd like to write the proposal for that law, I tell you.)

Tragic, and one of the reasons why I don't think I should ever have kids. Worst nightmare.

should I go on?...

well, I would, but my lunchbreak is nearing its end.

be careful out there....

new house.

i am in love with my house and don't want to ever leave it. we leave the doors open all the time and the dogs think they are at the Russian River. Anyway, blog, hopefully when we get settled in, I'll write stuff here. Until then, I'm going to walk around my house and touch the walls and stuff.

teef

okay, maybe i am fascinated by teef. here is a sampling of photos either on my wall or on my computer. enjoy.

I can't quit you.

Jane says, "why don't you just quit your blog?"
Well, Jane, that would be too easy, wouldn't it?
Here. Here is another blog update. Funny links and videos. Come on...you love it.

Bible-based Marriage. Take notes, this is history lesson, ya'll:


Is this story for real? Buck up, ol' lady. Drink some milk, stop sobbing.

BRANGIE IS DEAD???

I love some of the comments on this story: "Another individual obsessed with Teh Gay." "Marcarvage is a big closet case. It's been said he goes to more gay events than any gay man." ha ha.

and last but not least, Puddin's kin has been located, and his name is Elvis.


How was that Jane? Good enough?
bye.

here, kill 40 minutes.

Hi blog, have you missed me? I haven't missed you that much because Facebook has been needy and asking me to hang out with it alot.

Anyway, for this episode, I'd like to share some videos that are making me happy. Here goes:



Favorite part: When Neko says she's not giving birth, unless it's to a litter of puppies. Amen! Love you, Neko.



Hysterical. Really, really brilliant.


Almost as good.


Ack! cute!


Cuter still!


this is funny, i wish Puddin' could do this:


OMG, bad parking. funny, until your bumper falls off:


but wait, there's more!


okay, bye!

sorry, blog

i've ignored you so.

update! signing house papers tomorrow and will know when the sellers will be out. GET OUT OF OUR HOUSE!!! hha. Remember Amityville Horror? Maybe we should put some flies in the house and drip blood down the walls.






Speaking of horror films, we (well, I) rented Midnight Meat Train the other night. It was...okay. I just got really annoyed when there was a fist fight. I hate fist fights in horror films.










In other news:
She's kinda pretty, but ...yeah, that's all.


This woman is rad (watch til the end):



question, however. Why the buzz around Katherine McPhee? is she still famous?
I also like how the papz are asking everyone about same sex marriage now. I feel so famous, it's like they're asking about me.

Be careful out there, gay friends. Maybe go somewhere where the Mayor is not a caveman?

This is for SJ, since she totally loves this woman. (snort snort) I thought getting married and having a few litters meant "forever." I am devastated.

This commercial makes me misty.



Please don't become Governor of my home state. I'll give you some sopapillas if you don't.

Warning, this might be the BEST MOVIE EVER MADE.

I know Perez Hilton is doing some good in the world lately by speaking up about gay rights, but even I don't LOVE him.

and last but not least...

NEW CYNDI SONG. wheee!

(bye.)

Nothing says Grown Up...

like changing your renter's insurance to homeowner's insurance. Whoot!!!

other things happening:

I don't have the swine flu (yet), despite coworkers coming in sick (and one is in Mexico on vacation).



this is funny. remember, this is the guy who just had his tongue bit off by a prostitute. whoops:




Ignorant dinosaur speaks about an UNFORTUNATE INCIDENT.

Enlightened woman speaks about equality.

Lie buster.

Miss CA gets uglier.

The Zodiac Killer had a sidekick?


and last but not least, I'm trying on Twitter for kicks. I have a whopping 12 followers. I am taking the internet by storm!!!

ttfn.

bid accepted. i think this is "escrow"...

happiness. yay! stress. anxiety. inspections. loan papers. appraisals. sewer video.

i am just trying to hang in there. and yes, that picture in the last post...that's our new backyard!

okay, to talk about something else for a minute...

in today's news:

STUPID article. "Sisterly love"? gag! fashionable and acceptable? bleck.

RIP horses and ponies. UG, the pharmacy is to blame. That's so sad.

Sign us up! Anyone want to shoot a movie in a cottage??

This is cool!

The Huckaby story gets scarier and scarier.

Fun! Make your own 12 Galaxies sign!

and last but not least, be sure to check out this video. It will make you feel very glad that you are you.

ttfn.

s.o.s.

still.trying.to.buy.house.
offer.number.9.on.the.table.
please.send.luck.

emotional roller coaster & a one-eyed dog

Okay, where do we sign up for the 1st time home buyers support group? Seriously.

You come across an article like this, read the comments, and your heart kind of explodes a little. Maybe renting (and paying for my landlord's Lexus SUV) isn't THAT bad? ARGGGGG!!!!

Oh, and we've could have written this.

anyway...

This video makes me want to sharpen the ends of rainbows and shoot them at these idiots. Lightning bolts!? Where are the volcanoes, tornadoes, and earthquakes the gays are responsible for too?



(don't they look so sad and concerned? maybe they should be more mad and concerned about this, this, this, or this. .)

PS. here are the audition tapes for that shitty video. So, wait...which one is really the doctor!??

And, really, today is pretty shitty all the way around. I had no idea that our staff morale ("morale") breakfast wasn't being paid for by our work, I keep hearing budget cuts, budget cuts, budget cuts (when is one gonna cut me??), and something that seemed hopeful (not a house, something else) may not be as hopeful anymore. sigh. what could make it better?

WINK could make it better. I feel in love with her last night. I really wanted to just take her home on the spot, but Puddin' would be so mad. Anyway...she's on my mind...

Dear Oakland,

Why do act like it's totally easy to buy a house w/in your boundaries, when in realty you are like a fortress? Just wondering.

******
Anyway...let's not talk about homes right now. I will just say one word though..as a mantra...built-ins. okay...

so what is happening out there?:

Vermont joins Iowa at thumbing its nose to the backwards bigots in CA.
They're actually probably pulling their fingers down their face, and saying "FACE!!!"

Truly sad, sad news about Sandra, who had been missing in Tracy. There is an evil person out there, and I hope they get what's coming to them. Especially if it ends up it's the pastor.

More evil people.

MORE EVIL PEOPLE. wtf is happening out there? How many men are going to kill their families and then themselves. Just kill yourselves, jerks, and leave your families to revel in your being gone.

She likes gays and Boston Terriers? I love her!!

O'Reilly is probably gay.

Yay, little cattle dog!

and I think i'll end with this: